Yesterday's Non-Pdoc Appointment / Disability

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momofalexa

Yesterday's Non-Pdoc Appointment / Disability

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(07/29/09 08:48 AM)

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"Life is a millstone - YOU decide if it's going to grind you down or polish you up."

I figured I'd write an update on Alexa's missed doctor's appointment yesterday.

Bottom line is she had a psy doc appointment, was sleeping (she almost never sleeps in the afternoon unless it's a day she has to go to the doctor!) I raced home since she didn't answer her cell phone and woke her with a 1/2 hour to spare. She managed to fritter away the time and we didn't leave for 1 hour. As many of you know, she does NOT hurry...ever. Alexa has two speeds: slow and slower.

We were 20 minutes late and were turned away. Her psy doc just joined a huge mental health facility in our county and they are STRICT about appointments. I can't blame them but I want to because I'm frustrated. They will not allow you to reschedule on the spot. So, I will call her ped and see if he can write her scrips if the tdoc (who I have to "go through" to get to the psy doc, ridiculous, if you ask me) does not get back to me soon. She said when I spoke with her after the missed appointment (we showed up, but were late), that she didn't know WHEN she would be able to return my call with an answer.

They now only write 1 month at a time. Stupid! Anyway, my other option is a new psy doc and I have a list of who is on our insurance printed out. I was so stressed out and thought I might just strangle Alexa! (Not really, but the thought crossed my mind, believe me!!!)

I had reminded Alexa numerous times but did she set her cell phone alarm or do anything to prepare for this appointment? Of course not.

I almost had a major meltdown because I was trying to slog through traffic including a construction zone and an accident and race to the doctors and then trying to get back home...oh....I was having some road rage, I think!!!!! I just was angry that I wasted all this time and still didn't get scrips refilled and of course I'm terrified of what would happen if Alexa were to stop her meds altogether! Then I get mad thinking that the doctors should be responsible for what happens to the patients when they refuse to write a scrip for a maintenance medication!!!! GRRRRRR...I could just go on and on.

BTW, her ped called me personally yesterday and advised all her tests from the hives incident came back normal, no problems with her BP meds with the kidneys and such but she does have very low Vitamin D levels so he is calling in a scrip for a pill that she will take once a week for six weeks to get her levels higher very quickly. Thereafter, she will take a supplement. So, all in all, very good!

In the meantime, this morning I filled out the online application for social security benefits for Alexa now that she is 18. We'll see what that brings. It looks like we have a lot of documentation to get together. Should be lots of fun, not.

So, back to the original subject, three days of meds are left and no scrips. Wish me luck. Ack.

Heather
Mom of Alexa, (18 years old) Diagnosed BP-NOS (09/05), updated to BP II w/psychotic features (05/08)
Oppositional Defiant Disorder
Abilify (10 mg), Lamictal (200 mg), Klonipin (.5 mg) as needed, Vyvanse (30 mg)
Topamax at night only (100 mg) Seroquel at night only (200mg) *when she is willing*
Attends alternative therapeutic high school (Ohio)

Ebeths mom

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(07/29/09 08:57 AM)

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Ugg what a pain and hassle Heather!! Couldn't you just make her get into the car, ready or not? I guess not or you would have done that. So frustrating.
E sleeps alot in the afternoons also if she can.
Hopefully once she gets her vitamin D levels up a bit she will not be so tired. I know you said she doesn't go out much - that may be part of the reason her D levels are low. Your body makes vitamin D in response to sunlight. (why people have lower levels and are more tired in the winter). Maybe you can hook up her computer outside (or put her bed on the front lawn)! LOL

Kathy...mom to:
E (dd) - 18 BP NOS trileptal, geodon, zoloft, concerta, melatonin for sleep
DD 17 - healthy
DS 13 - healthy

Anita

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(07/29/09 08:58 AM)

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How frustrating and scary. I agree about the meds. These drs. deal with these people all the time and should know that they could get in serious trouble off meds. Hope they work with you.

Anita, mom to Kat,25, BP, living with us(sort of),mother to a 4 yr old and 2 yr old,currently off all meds

momofalexa

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(07/29/09 09:19 AM)

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"Life is a millstone - YOU decide if it's going to grind you down or polish you up."

Ebeths mom wrote:

Ugg what a pain and hassle Heather!! Couldn't you just make her get into the car, ready or not? I guess not or you would have done that. So frustrating.
Yes, I wish I could force her...that only escalates matters if I try to go that route so it's something I don't attempt anymore. Besides, Alexa could squish me like a bug, lol. She is much larger than I. Sigh.

Maybe you can hook up her computer outside (or put her bed on the front lawn)! LOL

I've considered the bed in the lawn, Kathy! I made her get out of the car to go to a sandwich place on our way home yesterday. She was mad because she felt she did not look nice. But, she got over it eventually.

Hopefully once she gets her vitamin D levels up a bit she will not be so tired. I know you said she doesn't go out much - that may be part of the reason her D levels are low. Your body makes vitamin D in response to sunlight. (why people have lower levels and are more tired in the winter).

Yes, this is a problem....she does not get much sunlight and our area is generally dark a lot because we have long winters here. Pediatricians are just now testing a lot for these Vitamin D deficiencies because they are VERY common, apparently.

Heather
Mom of Alexa, (18 years old) Diagnosed BP-NOS (09/05), updated to BP II w/psychotic features (05/08)
Oppositional Defiant Disorder
Abilify (10 mg), Lamictal (200 mg), Klonipin (.5 mg) as needed, Vyvanse (30 mg)
Topamax at night only (100 mg) Seroquel at night only (200mg) *when she is willing*
Attends alternative therapeutic high school (Ohio)

JoAnnSW

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(07/29/09 09:52 AM)

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As many of you know, she does NOT hurry...ever. Alexa has two speeds: slow and slower.

I thought I was the only one who had a daughter like that, lol. Having said that, I think it was terrible that the pdoc wouldn't see you because you were late. I don't see how it was an inconvenience for him/her. You were the one who would have been cheated by a shorter session. The pdoc sounds like a prima donna without much empathy for you and what you went through to get her there.

Good luck with the Social Security app for Alexa. I know three persons who got it after several years. They were turned down the first time but then got an attorney and took it to court. The judge ruled in favor of them all three times, and they then were paid retroactively to the time of their first application. One person waited four years, and got a 40 thousand dollar back payment.

JoAnn, daughter 22, dysphoric bipolar disorder and insulin dependent diabetes, currently controlled with Lamictal, 400mgs, Lithium 450mgs, Seroquel 500mgs, Klonipin 1mg and two types of Insulin

JoAnnSW

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(07/29/09 09:53 AM)

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I just thought of something. Would the pediatrician write temporary scrips for you if you explained what was going on?

JoAnn, daughter 22, dysphoric bipolar disorder and insulin dependent diabetes, currently controlled with Lamictal, 400mgs, Lithium 450mgs, Seroquel 500mgs, Klonipin 1mg and two types of Insulin

momofalexa

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(07/29/09 11:26 AM)

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"Life is a millstone - YOU decide if it's going to grind you down or polish you up."

Yes, JoAnn, I called the pediatrician to see if he would write them. No word yet but his nurse was AGHAST at her meds and said they are POTENT and he usually does not write such prescriptions. I wanted to reach through the phone and slap her but I was soooooo nice though. I feel like I'm about to explode!

In the meantime, the tdoc called me back and said schedule an appointment with the nurse. I asked if she could be seen in three days and she said, "this is the procedure". Every time I asked a question, the response was, "this is the procedure". I am very angry right now. I called the number she gave me and it's the med refill line so I left the refill information on there. In the meantime, I will call and schedule with the nurse I guess.

Talk about ridiculous. I want to scream. I feel slightly faint and sweaty. Gee, this is good for MY health, I bet.

Heather
Mom of Alexa, (18 years old) Diagnosed BP-NOS (09/05), updated to BP II w/psychotic features (05/08)
Oppositional Defiant Disorder
Abilify (10 mg), Lamictal (200 mg), Klonipin (.5 mg) as needed, Vyvanse (30 mg)
Topamax at night only (100 mg) Seroquel at night only (200mg) *when she is willing*
Attends alternative therapeutic high school (Ohio)

momofalexa

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(07/29/09 11:38 AM)

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"Life is a millstone - YOU decide if it's going to grind you down or polish you up."

O.K. I talked to some really nice lady in scheduling! She is scheduled with the Nurse tomorrow at 4:00 p.m. Going to give MY parents a heads up. Alexa needs to be ready by 3:15 p.m. I will leave work at 1/2 day I think so I have plenty of time to make sure she has ample hair brushing and make up time, etc. This should be a real blast..I now feel like a balloon that the air has been let out of. A big blob of exhaustion from being on high alert for so long! Gaaaaaaa......

Heather
Mom of Alexa, (18 years old) Diagnosed BP-NOS (09/05), updated to BP II w/psychotic features (05/08)
Oppositional Defiant Disorder
Abilify (10 mg), Lamictal (200 mg), Klonipin (.5 mg) as needed, Vyvanse (30 mg)
Topamax at night only (100 mg) Seroquel at night only (200mg) *when she is willing*
Attends alternative therapeutic high school (Ohio)

Rayni

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(07/29/09 12:17 PM)

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I dreamed of many things when he was born ...

Just a big squishy

Rayni

momofalexa

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(07/29/09 12:43 PM)

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"Life is a millstone - YOU decide if it's going to grind you down or polish you up."

Thanks! The ped's nurse called and said he could not write the scrips. That is fine because I left her a message stating to ignore my prior request as we did get in to see the nurse at the psy doc's office. I'm mad to hear he would not write the scrips anyway! What do you do when there is no back up? Scary!

Heather
Mom of Alexa, (18 years old) Diagnosed BP-NOS (09/05), updated to BP II w/psychotic features (05/08)
Oppositional Defiant Disorder
Abilify (10 mg), Lamictal (200 mg), Klonipin (.5 mg) as needed, Vyvanse (30 mg)
Topamax at night only (100 mg) Seroquel at night only (200mg) *when she is willing*
Attends alternative therapeutic high school (Ohio)

wondering

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(07/29/09 01:56 PM)

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They built these tracks because they knew someday the train would come. ...

I don't blame you for being frustrated on all counts, Heather! And I also agree, it's not that you didn't show up, you were late. They should have let you in for the remaining time. It's not like another appt should have been scheduled for anyone else in that time slot. And how frustrating is it that often it is the patients who have to wait and wait at drs' appts with no recourse, but there sure are penalties in reverse!

I wish that we could leave off our loved ones at the homes of these drs that make you jump through hoops for the scripts or that won't change the meds when needed. Let them have a few hours of an improperly medicated person, and they'll be running for the script pad!

Hope that all goes smoothly - and btw, what is the rationale behind writing only one month's worth of scripts without refills? That seems like an awfully shortsighted method, and one that leaves people in trouble with the difficulty of appts at times. I guess it forces monthly visits, but it doesn't sound like those are particularly easy to get. Good luck, and watch out for your health and blood pressure!

JoAnnSW

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(07/29/09 02:03 PM)

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I sure wouldn't want to have that tdoc for my counselor. It sounds to me that she needs a refresher course in empathy and dealing with people. I'm glad that you finally got some help from the scheduling person, and it looks like you will be able to get the meds that Alexa is supposed to have. I'm sorry for all the stress this has put you through, thanks to those jackasses and prima donnas.

JoAnn, daughter 22, dysphoric bipolar disorder and insulin dependent diabetes, currently controlled with Lamictal, 400mgs, Lithium 450mgs, Seroquel 500mgs, Klonipin 1mg and two types of Insulin

justlovehim

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(07/29/09 02:20 PM)

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"For I know the plans I have for you ... plans for a hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11

Sorry I've been at work today. Wow what a mess. I have run into the same problem here with being late for appts. Believe me it isn't only GIRLS who have problems with time. Matt has two speeds.... slow and slower. He takes forever to walk anywhere or do anything unless he's playing sports and he is very fast. It is so aggravating though that the office staff acts like that! It makes you want to tell them "the procedure" LOL!!

I'm glad it all worked out and you get to see the pdoc nurse tomorrow. I don't know what you are to do if you can't get in again. It's not like you can bodily lift her from the house to the car. Do they not flex at all? After all, it is a psy office. I'm mad about it!

My ped would have written the scripts if only for a week till we could get an appt. However, we are with a family practice doc now. I don't know what he would do since Matt is new to him. Well, it worked out, but the stress will kill ya. Try to relax tonight!

Chris

DS-Matt,18 ( WE MADE IT!!! ) : DSolder- 24 : DD- 22

Depression, dx May 2008, ADHD- dx age 9
refuses meds and NOT LIVING AT HOME BY HIS CHOICE

"Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice!" Philippians 4:4

Elainekh

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(07/29/09 04:05 PM)

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If this happens again, check with your regular pharmacy to see if they can get you enuf til your appt. That's what we have done in the past.
BTW: my DS also goes slow and slower....especially when getting ready to go somewhere

Elaine, Mom to DS, 19, seroquel 100mg at night (or when he sleeps, sometimes!!)

momofalexa

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(07/29/09 04:27 PM)

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"Life is a millstone - YOU decide if it's going to grind you down or polish you up."

LOL...lots of slow and slower moving kids, eh? All your comments are so appreciated. I need the validation because I am starting to feel like the one who needs meds!

And the kicker, ladies...drum roll please.....

The nurse called me and said, "Hi, it looks like you got an appointment tomorrow with Dr. J." I said, "No, I actually made the appointment to meet with you." She said, "Oh, well the doctor leaves at 4:00 so that doesn't work." Now I am scratching my head. So, I say, "What does it matter when the doctor leaves since our appointment is with you?" She replies that THE DOCTOR WRITES THE PRESCRIPTIONS!!!!!!! AAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!! So, the only other time we can come in is 1:30 p.m. Now, I ask you, why the doctor cannot simply write the prescriptions in the morning and then when we arrive at 4:00 p.m., the nurse can give them to us? Well, no, because we have to wait for our appointment. I don't know what is WRONG with these people???!!!!!

Elaine, I will keep that in mind about the pharmacy. I didn't know they would do that!

Tomorrow I am finding a new doctor. I don't even care if the doctor is part of this process or if she is aghast about everything. It's not worth the frustration anymore. We have been with this doctor since 2004! I have NEVER encountered any of these issues until she switched to this practice. NEVER!!

So, tomorrow I will go to work, leave early (after about an hour), because I have one important deadline to handle. Then come home and make sure A. is awake and ready and we will leave here around 12:30 p.m. in order to be NICE AND EARLY SO I CAN SIT THERE AND STARE DISGUSTEDLY AT THESE MORONS. Sigh.

In the meantime, my boss called about a work related disaster (phone lines not working). So, I'm forgetting about everything and chilling out tonight. I've had it with today.

Heather
Mom of Alexa, (18 years old) Diagnosed BP-NOS (09/05), updated to BP II w/psychotic features (05/08)
Oppositional Defiant Disorder
Abilify (10 mg), Lamictal (200 mg), Klonipin (.5 mg) as needed, Vyvanse (30 mg)
Topamax at night only (100 mg) Seroquel at night only (200mg) *when she is willing*
Attends alternative therapeutic high school (Ohio)

justlovehim

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(07/29/09 07:00 PM)

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"For I know the plans I have for you ... plans for a hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11

inhale, exhale...... try to relax. I'm sorry about all this crap today! I'd be so absolutely frustrated with this whole office and I sure don't blame you for switching. It's ridiculous!!!!!!!!!!

Chris

DS-Matt,18 ( WE MADE IT!!! ) : DSolder- 24 : DD- 22

Depression, dx May 2008, ADHD- dx age 9
refuses meds and NOT LIVING AT HOME BY HIS CHOICE

"Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice!" Philippians 4:4

Ebeths mom

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(07/30/09 08:25 AM)

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Wow, Heather, this pdoc practice is really messed up! This gets me really angry - a pdoc KNOWS how important meds are!! They should have at least written the refills on the day your original appointment was, when you were late. It's not like they don't know what meds she is on, or what ones need refills!
Our pdoc will write refills without seeing E if we are running low and don't have an appointment scheduled right away. We just call and make sure to give her a couple days notice.
Good luck with the search for a new pdoc! Maybe this will be a blessing in disguise and you'll find someone that you A really like. Make sure to let the current pdoc know the reason you are leaving the practice! You have nothing to lose.

Kathy...mom to:
E (dd) - 18 BP NOS trileptal, geodon, zoloft, concerta, melatonin for sleep
DD 17 - healthy
DS 13 - healthy

lilyns

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(07/30/09 10:26 AM)

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I don't know how you managed to keep your cool, Heather. Iwould have been screaming so loudly, you'd have heard me over there in Ohio! IMHO, there is absolutely no excuse for those "precedures" and you should most definitely look for a different p-doc who does not make you jump through hoops. I'm sure there must be someone on your plan who is more humane than the one you currently have. Glad to hear that you ultimately were able to get the scrips (you did get them, right?).

With regard to "Miss Slow and slower" - I have come to realize since Lilah has been at Grove, that making excuses for our kids being unable to meet certain expectations due to their "disorder" is not only counterproductive, but enabling. They can do many of the things we claim they cannot - like maintaining a modicum of neatness, getting ready on time, etc. - but choose not to because they know that we really do not expect them to. I am painfully aware of how agonizing it is for us parents to elicit the slightest bit of cooperation from our kids, yet recently I have begun to see with Lilah that if I stick to my guns in terms of consequences - no matter how scared I am of her anticipated reaction - she will ultimately cooperate. The key is to give a consequence that she truly cares about and then disengage from any bargaining or arguing. (i.e. - "If ____X_____ is not done by the time we have to leave, your text messaging will be suspended for ___ days.")

Lynne,
Mom of Lilah, age 16 (Abilify-15 mgms)

Last Edited By: lilyns 07/30/09 10:35 AM. Edited 1 times.

Ebeths mom

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(07/30/09 10:41 AM)

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You are right Lynne, E has done this in the past - not done her best (or even acceptable) at school and at home, and uses her bp as an excuse. But I have seen her rise to the occasion many times so we both know she IS capable of more than she convinces herself she is. Lately she has been doing remarkably well, and is enjoying the better relationship we are having. Even though it's a bit childlike, she keeps making statements like "I'm being the good one lately" She likes herself this way, too.

Kathy...mom to:
E (dd) - 18 BP NOS trileptal, geodon, zoloft, concerta, melatonin for sleep
DD 17 - healthy
DS 13 - healthy

justlovehim

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(07/30/09 11:40 AM)

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"For I know the plans I have for you ... plans for a hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11

We do still have to deal with the absolute refusal to cooperate though. Maybe the consequence thing will work. I know one thing for sure, on drugs, consequences do not matter. Nothing matters. Life does require all of us to stay strong. I am learning through my ordeal that Matt CAN do alot of things that I have enabled. Lynne is right, lower expectations breeds slower reactions. It's not good for them or us.

Chris

DS-Matt,18 ( WE MADE IT!!! ) : DSolder- 24 : DD- 22

Depression, dx May 2008, ADHD- dx age 9
refuses meds and NOT LIVING AT HOME BY HIS CHOICE

"Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice!" Philippians 4:4

JoAnnSW

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(07/30/09 12:11 PM)

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recently I have begun to see with Lilah that if I stick to my guns in terms of consequences - no matter how scared I am of her anticipated reaction - she will ultimately cooperate.

I agree with this when the kids/young adults are stable and taking their meds. At our house my DH is always scared of her anticipated reaction, she knows this, and uses it. He has IMHO some OCD issues himself and is obsessive over any kind of property damage, so throwing things, slamming doors, etc. gets him all worked up to an excessive degree. He usually will capitulate to avoid such an episode, which has made it harder for me to get her to accept responsibility and consequences.

JoAnn, daughter 22, dysphoric bipolar disorder and insulin dependent diabetes, currently controlled with Lamictal, 400mgs, Lithium 450mgs, Seroquel 500mgs, Klonipin 1mg and two types of Insulin

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