Dear Amanda,
Welcome to our little community. There are many parents here who have experienced or are experiencing what you are experiencing with you son.

Have you a copy of The Explosive Child by Greene in your home library? Many of us here have found it the very best help for working with our challenging children.

Is your son on the maximum doses of Depakote and Seroquel for his size? Or would an increase in these meds be possible to see if he would stabilize more.

My daughter is on Seroquel and was on Depakote. We have noticed over time that increases in both meds made a difference. I'm not familiar with Focalin so can't comment on that med.

Is there a local NAMI (National Association for Mental Illness) chapter near you? Google their website to find the closest chapter to your community. They often can provide a lot of help and support to families in your situation.

It sure sounds like residential care would help, but there seems to be such limited options for that for most of us who aren't billionaires.

Please keep us informed on your situation with your son and take care of yourself in the meantime. You won't be able to be a caregiver to your son and your daughter or be a wife to your husband if you are worn to a frazzle.

Most of us "old timers" here have learned that we need to take "minute vacations", pursue our hobbies, interests and friendships in order to keep our energy up for the task of caring for our bipolar children. We don't always succeed at caring for ourselves, because it is easier said than done, but at least we know we should and keep trying.

Hang in there and stay strong,

JoAnn, mom to Hilary 19, Bipolar and Diabetic, currently on Lamictal, Seroquel, Lithium, Clonopin, and Insulin