Thanks for all your responses, day three and everything has been great. He is a little shell shocked as of right now. He has said many times over he does not want to go away again and he is sorry and will try so hard, I beleive him. Even though I do not beleive some things he controls its how I handle my reactions towards him, it is extremely hard to maintain sometimes but if I do not things get out of hand and both Zach and I lose. So I beleive we have both learned alot and we are all scared . We will have counsling and that will be helpful. He told me yesterday that I was a good Mom and he never wanted to leave again(lol) hopefully that lasts. I have a good feeling with this long break I have regrouped and ready to continue on with no matter what comes our way.
thanks again

ellen

Zach 13 PDD,BP